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Revealed for the first time: Goebbels’ plan to destroy Britain’s radar defences
Gerard Jackson
Austria’s socialist ‘Defense’ Minister Herr Norbert Darabos a stupid and bigoted attack on the US missile defence. According to Herr Darabos Europe has nothing to fear from a nuclear armed Iran run by a bunch of Jew-hating murderous fanatics and that America’s missile proposition amounts to “provocation”. He didn’t say, however, that Israel had nothing to fear.
Perhaps he thinks it’s OK for Iran’s neo-Nazis to implement their own version of the “Final Solution” in addition to the one implemented by another rather well-known Austrian socialist by the name of Adolf Schicklegruber. Darabos’ idiocy sent us to Brookes’ archives to retrieve this article (first published 5 June 2003) that mocked the left’s dishonest assaults on the America’s proposed national missile defence system. There’s no two-ways about it: like cultists everywhere, the left never learns.
Sixty-five years ago Joseph Goebbels hatched a devilish scheme to destroy Britain’s radar defences without firing a shot. Goebbels had been given details of how British radar installations were proceeding at a rapid pace. Aware of what this could mean for the Luftwaffe in the event of war, Goebbels immediately called a conference of his closest colleagues. The object: sabotage Britain’s radar installations without a declaration of war or any warlike act of any kind.
Goebbels was almost beside himself with worry, especially knowing how fickle the Fuhrer could be at times. What was he to do? Then it hit him. The sheer simplicity of the scheme left him breathless. Unable to contain himself, he goose-stepped about his living room throughout the early hours of the morning, continually congratulating himself on his brilliance.
Hitler had no sooner arisen from his bed when he found Goebbels in his presence, excited and grinning like a Cheshire cat.
“I have it, mein Fuhrer, the way to destroy Britain’s radar defences using only peaceful means”.
Intrigued, Hitler gestured to Goebbels to sit down. Once seated, Goebbels blurted it out. “We’ll publicly denounce Britain's radar installations as an electronic defence shield against which they can defend themselves from the retaliatory strikes of the Luftwaffe while the Royal Air Force bombs German cities and massacres their inhabitants”.
“Interesting”, murmured Hitler. “Is there more?”
“Is the Pope a Catholic? Is Stalin a Bolshevik? Is Mussolini a.
Hitler cut him off with an impatient: “Yes, yes, yes, Joseph, but do get on with it”.
“It is so simple that it’s pure genius”, responded the glowing Goebbels. “We’ll accuse the British of being provocative, of causing an arms race, of forcing Germany to expand its air force and increase military spending, especially on electronic counter-measures, all because the British refuse to dismantle their electronic shield. We'll even say it doesn’t work or that it’s not a hundred per cent and that the government should spend the money on hospitals and schools, or something like that”.
“Electronic shield”, said Hitler rather thoughtfully. “I like it. It has a militaristic ring about it. It’s the kind of term that will really get those stupid, degenerate pacifists to protest. Very clever, very clever indeed”. Goebbels’ grin grew even wider, almost stretching from earlobe to earlobe. “Here’s my chance”, he thought, “to down Goering, Himmler and Borman. They’re getting too big for their jackboots anyway”.
“How do you intend to do it?” asked Hitler with an inquisitive and almost admiring look.
“Simple”, shot back Goebbels, as his chest expanded with pride and confidence. “We’ll do what Stalin did only we’ll do it better”.
Now Hitler was puzzled. “Stalin? What are we going to do? Send the British to Siberia”, he said with a sly grin.
“Certainly not,” said Goebbels, who was now looking a little peeved. “The peace penny”.
“Of course”, said Hitler as he suddenly leapt to his feet. “Why didn’t I think of that. Now I remember. That was last year when that cunning old dog Stalin got the Comintern to set up the International Peace Campaign in Brussels and all those dumb Englanders signed a peace pledge and a peace petition. Why they even demanded a peace penny”.
“That’s the one,” said Goebbels, getting more excited about his project by the minute.
“I have doubts, however,” muttered Hitler. Goebbels’ heart began to sink. “Certain things bother me”, as he sat back in his favourite armchair, legs crossed, chin resting on his hands. “First we tell those Englanders that their electronic shield is a provocation, a threat to peace, a plot against Germany, an incitement to an arms race, and so on. Then we tell them it won’t work anyway and that it’s a waste of resources and they should spend the money on social services. We can’t have it both ways. They’re not that stupid, Joseph. It either works or it doesn’t”.
“O.K, O.K. How about just concentrating on the aggressive side of the issue,” replied an increasingly worried Goebbels, “the threatening side”.
“Alas”, said Hitler in a somewhat condescending tone, “you simply do not understand the British. Much as they desire peace they are not stupid. I appreciate your talents and loyalty, Joseph, but it just won’t work. I mean, there is just no way you can get them to believe that an electronic shield is an act of aggression. Anyway, the British are a suspicious lot. If we make a fuss about it they’re bound to realise that it will work and that it bothers us. Why should it bother them, they’ll say, if they’re not planning something themselves? No, Joseph, better not to say anything that might cause them to accelerate their radar installation program”.
Goebbels left, thinking the Führer had made a terrible mistake.
Now I admit that none of this happened, but that’s only because Goebbels didn’t think of it. Britain’s radar defence system was the Star Wars project of its time. An electronic shield that would allow the British to detect and track enemy aircraft, radioing their positions to waiting RAF fighters. Without radar Britain would have lost the war and Darabos would be wearing jackboots today.
The same arguments that are being levelled against the Bush administration’s proposed missile defence system could just as easily have been levelled against Britain’s expenditure on radar development and installations. Fortunately for the world they were not and because of that we are a free people. Let’s keep it that way. Build the damn thing, George, and tell the left to drop dead.
BrookesNews.Com
Monday 27 August 2007